Wednesday 9 September 2009

The two exceptions to the rule


A mistress can never allow a roving eye. However there are two women for whom I would chuck the notion of fidelity on the outdated ideas pile, along with slavery, burning witches and voting Labour.

The first of these gorgeous ladies is Ms Lauren Lavern. Not only is she beautiful, glamourous and funny, but I have also had the pleasure of meeting her (if albeit briefly) and can testify to her genuine all round loveliness. The thing that really rocks my boat however is her passion for music.

I have never understood why so few women are into music. I have several female friends and family members that don't own a single album. The worst offenders however are women who have 'inherted' their boyfriend/husband's iPods when they upgraded. Included in this inheritance package is all his music. I mean, what's that all about...? That's like wearing someone else's underpants...after they've pissed in them.

Those women who do buy music tend to stick to the safe bets - Robbie Williams, Beyonce or The Kooks. Very few seem interested in actively seeking out new music and I don't understand why. Music, as far as I see it, isn't a gender specific thing. It's not like cars or computers or other boring men stuff, that's just about cogs, wheels, nuts and bolts. Music is about art, beauty and the thing men fear most...feelings!

I am a self confessed new music geek. I spend far too much time online reading blogs, downloading tunes and buying tickets to see new bands just because I like their name (can't wait to see Dinosaur Pile Up!). But I feel a bit lonely in my music fetish men's world. So the lovely Lauren warms my cockles and makes me feel a little less alone.

My second dazzling doll is Venus de Milo look-a-like, Florence Welsh (of Florence and the Machine). On hearing last night's Mercury Music Prize Award announcement I cursed and spat in the eyes of Speech Debelle, screaming from the rooftops (or at least my Facebook page): "Florence you was robbed!!!".

I'm not one to be caught up in hype. I genuinely think her album is the best I have heard all year: her voice has amazing range and sends shivers down my spine; her lyrics pack a punch (Drumming Song); she writes with beauty on the most original subjects (My Boy Builds Coffins); and god dam-it she just makes me want to dance (Dog Days).

She reminds me PJ Harvey in that there's a feminist heart to her music. In some ways she's better than Harvey who could be a bit heavy handed with the snakes and bleeding symbolism. But boy, how many women do I think of when I hear Kiss With A Fist. Way too many for my own liking.

After I'd got over the horrible injustice of it all I actually went back and listened again to Speech Debelle and relented slightly. My first sneery 'She's just a black female Mikey Streets' changed to 'Hey, cool, she's like a black female Mikey Streets', because actually I think the world needs a black female British hip hop star, especially after the sad demise of Ms Dynamite.

And this is why I think the Mercury Music Prize is important. The Guardian reports today that this is the first time a woman has won the prize in seven years. It gives young black women in South East London a platform. I think that's reason enough to keep the awards and I personally will be watching again in 2010.

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